There are circumstances where our participants may be apprehensive about others’ reactions, due to cultural norms or otherwise, and would prefer to keep the situation to themselves or within the host family e.g. being a victim of sexual harassment, abuse, or online exploitation, etc. As participants may be unaware of the resources and support AFS can provide them in these types of circumstances and others, it is important for you and them to know that AFS Liaisons and staff undergo training so that they are well-equipped to support our participants and host families under such circumstances.
If your hosted participant shares with you a sensitive situation regarding their personal safety or well-being, either on program or in their home country, it is important that you share this information with your liaison, regardless of whether your participant has asked you not to share it with others.
Your liaison has the resources and discretion to provide or obtain the appropriate support for you and your participant to process the experience. It is important to tell your participant that by informing the liaison, you can work together to determine the best path forward.
How to Support Someone Who Has Experienced Abuse
It can be hard to know what to do to help a friend, family member, or participant who is a survivor of abuse or exploitation. Victims of abuse and/or exploitation may experience a range of emotional responses after an incident. Please read below for some helpful hints for how to support someone who has experienced abuse and/or exploitation.
What you can say to a survivor or victim of abuse:
- I'm sorry this happened to you.
- It wasn't your fault.
- Thank you for telling me.
- I am proud of you for sharing this with me.
- I'm always here if you want to talk.
- Can I do anything for you?
What can you do for a survivor or victim of abuse:
- Listen and be available.
- Believe and do not judge.
- Recognize that recovery takes a long time.
- Respect the decisions that the survivor makes.
- Be gentle, sensitive, and respectful of the survivor's needs.
- Offer additional help. Remember, the AFS Medical Plan provides coverage for up to 12 sessions of counseling, and your liaison or AFS staff can assist in connecting your student to a trained mental health professional.
What NEVER to say to a survivor:
- It was your fault.
- You could have avoided it had you...
- It's been so long! Get over it!
- You wanted it/You were asking for it.
- It's not that big of a deal; it happens to lots of people
- I don't believe you.
There's no right way to heal from trauma. Be there to listen, to care, and to help!